The Flip Side of Sin (7/8)

7:  Regression

First Officer’s Personal Log:

I left Lt. Uhura’s quarters at 0300 hours.  I was confident that no one would observe my actions as I headed for my quarters.  I needed to meditate; for I am fully aware that I lost a semblance of control the previous evening.  My clandestine interest in Lt. Uhura has caused me to behave in a most inappropriate manner.  I was not pleased at her determination to seek out male company.  However, I will admit that the evening was, in addition to other things, pleasurable.  Lt. Uhura has a way of drawing out my more intense tendencies; those I don’t normally acknowledge due to my Vulcan heritage.

I admit that I am as fond of Lt. Uhura as my sensibilities will allow.  However, my duty is to the Enterprise and I will not allow my fondness for her to distract me from the demands of my position.  I will also admit that it will be difficult to maintain my calm if I were to see her attempt to seek out another male.   I do not care for such behavior.  I do not care to see a woman I am fond of the center of another man’s attention.  The appropriate thing to do is to engage her in private conversation so that she will understand that it is not beneficial for her to do such a thing; Vulcans do not share their chosen mates.  I am fully aware that my actions of last night acknowledge Lt. Uhura as such.  It is the way of things.

Our conversation should also address her feelings and intentions toward me.  I have known from the time of her arrival that she harbors significant interest in me.  In his depiction of the alternative universe from which she hails, Captain Kirk said that women had to align themselves with males as a matter of survival.  I am unsure if Miss Uhura will think that my interest in her equals an alignment.  I did not even know if she had been aligned with a male from her universe.  She gave the impression that she had no need for such a relationship.  Nevertheless, I would have her as my companion if she would have me and I had no reason to think that she would not.

 It is imperative that we speak as soon as our schedules will allow.

*

Charlene met me at our usual table in the mess.  Her eyes were wide as she sat down with her tray and I knew what she was going to say before she said it.  I knew that my expression said it all; I looked like I’d been thoroughly and completely fucked.  That sexy Vulcan made me come hard enough—several times—to fall into a coma-like sleep.  I haven’t been done like that in a mighty long time.

Charlene grinned as she sipped her coffee.  “You fucked him, didn’t you?”

“Does it show?”

“Hell yes.”

“Keep that quiet, all right?  I’m really not trying to put this out so that everyone knows.  Do you think they suspect?”

“Ny, what Spock did last night shocked everyone in the bar.  He does not show emotion, not at all.  It was obvious that he did not like what was going on with us, with you.  People don’t know what to think; Spock fucking anyone isn’t something they’d be likely to assume.  From my assessment of the resultant conversations, I think everyone thinks he yelled at you for something related to your duty.  His actions certainly were those of a pissed-off First Officer.”

“He was upset, but it wasn’t about my duty.”

“Was it about that slutty-ass outfit you were sporting?”

I shrugged.  He certainly had had an opinion about my outfit.  “Maybe.  And you’re one to talk, Char.  You looked as slutty as I did, and speaking of getting fucked, did you?”

“Of course, and I’ve lined up an appointment for pussy maintenance tonight.   You remember that handsome, dark-skinned guy that bought us drinks?”

I nodded.  “Yes.  He was fine as hell.  Did you fuck him last night?”

“Yes I did.  But this isn’t about me, Ny.  This is about you and Mr. Spock.  Was the sex good?  Can Spock get it?  I can’t believe I’m asking about this.”

I sighed, thinking about how fabulous his dick felt in my mouth and up in me.  “It was excellent, and yes, he can.”

Charlene’s eyes nearly popped out of her head.  “You lucky bitch!  Why did I suspect that he could?  Wow!”  Then she leaned forward as if to share another secret.  “I happen to know that Chris Chapel has been trying to get Spock in bed since her simpering ass came on board the Enterprise.  She isn’t the only one; Mr. Spock’s got a lot of women’s noses wide open.  And you stroll your foxy ass up here and get him in bed in less than two weeks?  Don’t be surprised if you catch some flak, Ny.”

“No one’s going to know we had sex unless you tell, Char.”

“Oh, you know I won’t say a word, Nyota.  But you better wipe that ‘I-just-got-fucked’ expression off your face, because women will know and they will put two and two together.  Chapel may try to give you a random injection if she finds out.”

“I will beat that bitch’s ass if she lays a finger on me, Charlene.  I already knocked out two of her teeth; fools jump up to get beat down, you know.  That’s the way it is in my universe.”  I wished Chapel would try me.

“I know, but it’s not that way here, Ny.  You can ease up on that beat-a-bitch mentality.”

I shrugged.  Such a frame of mind isn’t easily shed.  I didn’t know if I could do it completely.

Charlene continued.  “You should be aware that scuttlebutt says that Mr. Spock is a one-woman man.  Where that came about, I don’t know, but it’s part of the rumor mill.  I mean, how would anyone guess that if they can’t picture Spock having sex?”

I nodded.  So was my universe’s Mr. Spock, with his stuck-up ass.  “I know.”

“Well, he’s probably thinking you’re his woman, Ny.  Just for your information.”

I sipped my juice.  “I’m no man’s woman, Char.  I’m not trying to align with anybody; I don’t require it.”

Charlene bit into her orange.  “I’m just letting you know, Ny.  Don’t be surprised if he thinks it.  The best thing for you to do is to talk to him and find out where you stand with him.  Spock isn’t known for fucking around, and that’s a rare thing on this ship.  Kirk he ain’t.”

“Fair enough,” I said.  “You are right, Char.  I’ll see if we can speak later on.”

“I don’t mind saying that I am a little envious, Ny.  You fucked Mr. Spock; a lot of women have been dying to know if he was good in bed.  The speculation is that he is.”

“He is.  There is something to be said for an irate Vulcan, Charlene.  I’d be lying if I said otherwise.  I don’t know how long it’s been since he had sex, but…it won’t be long before he will have it again, I assure you.”

“I bet.”  Charlene ate a spoonful of yogurt.  “Do you like him, Ny?  I mean, really like him?”

I bit into a piece of toast.  I had a thing for my universe’s Spock and it automatically transferred to this universe’s version.  But was it based in sex?  I didn’t know.  My Spock didn’t give me the time of day, but this one was more than interested in me. 

“I bet he’d make a great boyfriend.  Spock is as straight as they come, Ny.”

“I’ve always viewed men as toys or tools to be manipulated, Char.  I’ve never had a boyfriend.  I wouldn’t know what to do with one; women don’t have those kinds of choices in my world.  You don’t take, you get taken.”

“They can be nice, Ny.  Don’t knock it, give him a chance.  See what happens.  You deserve to have a good man in your life.”

I looked at my friend.  Charlene was always honest with me and now was no different.  She was right.  We needed to talk.

*

I was introspective and pensive during my shift.  Mr. Spock was the epitome of professional, as was I.  No one would have ever guessed that we had sex last night and as far as I was concerned, no one would.  I knew I could trust Charlene to keep our secret.  The shift was standard operating procedure and that gave me the time to think about how incredible last night was.  Spock had pleased me in every way a woman could be sexually pleased.  I was content and satisfied. 

Time passed in a calm daze, and when I was returning from my break, Mr. Spock asked to speak with me.  We were in the turbolift heading back to the bridge.  I said nothing, but smiled at him invitingly.  I knew he was thinking about last night and it didn’t matter if it didn’t show on his face.

“Lt. Uhura.”

“Mr. Spock.”

“How are you feeling?”

“Splendid.  Thank you.”  I flashed him a seductive smile and made the twins pop.   The tips of his ears flushed a pale green.  “I don’t get a thank you?”

Mr. Spock looked at the doors of the lift.  I pressed the STOP button and smiled again.  “I know I wasn’t the only one who enjoyed myself last night, Mr. Spock.”

He finally met my eyes.  “Last night was…pleasurable.”

“Pleasurable is an understatement, don’t you think?”  I reached out and ran a red talon down the front of his tunic.  “Any chance we can do it again?”

“Actually, Miss Uhura,” Spock began, “I would like to schedule some time this evening to speak with you regarding our...association.”

I raised an eyebrow. It looked as if Charlene might be right.  “Really?” 

“I think it is appropriate that we discuss what took place between us.  There are ramifications and boundaries that we must consider…if we are to, as you say, ‘do it again.’”

I really wanted to do it again and so I was game.  “All right, Mr. Spock.”

“Would you be available at 1900 hours?”

“I most certainly will be.”  Even if I had plans, which I didn’t, I had no problem changing them for this luscious, sexy Vulcan.  “Would you like to meet in my quarters or in neutral territory?”

“To maintain appearances, I would like to meet you in front of the lounge and take a walk from there.  Is this acceptable to you?”

I ran my finger over his chin.  “Absolutely.”

Mr. Spock pushed the lift button.  “I shall see you then, Miss Uhura.”

Just before the doors opened to the bridge, I chuckled.  “I’ll be waiting, Mr. Spock.”

*

I inserted my meal card into the slot and waited with a measure of irritation for my lunch to dispense.  One thing that would be hard to get used to in this universe is the reconstituted food, even though I had upgraded Miss Princess’ staid meal card to one that actually had food on it.  Real women eat and I had curves to maintain.  I chose a double cheeseburger and fries.   Meals here would never be the same as the luxuriant food I’d had on the ISS-E; maybe the only thing about my universe that I missed.   But I had no choice; everyone on this ship ate this crappy reconstituted food. 

I grabbed my tray and headed for a corner table to think about some things; Mr. Spock had definitely given me a lot to consider.  Before I got to my table, I stopped at the condiment counter to pick up a container of ketchup and add extra salt to my fries.  I was in my own world, feeling pretty good when the hair on the back of my neck stood up.  A gold-sleeved arm reached across me and I head a low voice by my ear: “Lieutenant Uhura…”

Instinctively, I dropped my tray, reached into my bosom and snatched out my Harpy.  I knew that voice anywhere and it never failed to make me shudder in revulsion.  I turned and swiped my blade in a downward motion; I was in defense mode and my instincts were tingling.  Before I had a chance to consider where I was and who he was, I slashed Lt. Sulu across the face.  He cried out and jumped back, holding his bleeding temple.

“Damn it!” he yelled.  “Lt. Uhura!”

I blinked a couple of times, as if I were coming out of a daze.  All eyes were on me.  I started looking around, wary of the fact that I was once again the center of attention but not in a way I would have preferred.  I backed up, clenched my knife and jumped into a battle stance, waiting for the next motherfucker to come my way.  I didn’t intend to cause any more problems, but I knew they would come for me.  All I knew to do was battle-up and welcome all comers.  Part of me was saddened that it was so difficult for me not to get into trouble over here.  But Sulu…

Crewmates flocked to the bleeding helmsman; someone called sickbay and someone else contacted Security.  My mind raced as I thought of some way to get out of the mess I’d gotten myself into.  I scanned the cafeteria; there were about fifty people between me and the exit.  I wanted to escape, to get out of here, to run.  But running was stupid; I was on a starship and there was nowhere to hide.  They would find me.  I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.

‘What next, girlfriend?’  I thought as I scanned the room.

“Lieutenant Uhura?” It was the captain and his face was red, he was so mad.  “Lieutenant Uhura!!!  What is the meaning of this?”

I couldn’t speak.  I swallowed, but met his hard gaze head on.  I shook my head.  I didn’t know what to say; it wasn’t a planned attack.  I didn’t know how to tell him this, but it was obvious that he didn’t want to hear anything I had to say.

Mr. Spock stood next to the captain and I could not read his expression.  Was he disappointed?  Was he angry that I had another knife?  Was he furious that I’d gotten into trouble again?  I didn’t know what to think, what to feel or what to do.  I wasn’t even able to decide if I was disappointed in myself.  I had tried to assimilate; to get used to this world, but my defensive instincts were just that: instinct.  I was the recipient of more than one skirmish with my world’s Lt. Sulu and it was natural as breathing that I defend myself from his dangerous attentions.  He would never ever violate me again.  I squeezed my Harpy.

Captain Kirk shook his head as he glared at me.  “Security!”

In moments, eight men stood at the ready.  I clenched my knife again, but I knew that the best thing for me to do would be to go without a fight.  I’d done enough damage to last a lifetime.

The security team surrounded me, phasers out.  I wondered if they were set to stun or to kill.  I looked at Mr. Spock and dropped the Harpy, halfway regretting that I had to give up my blade.  But if I’d never had it on me, this wouldn’t have happened.

Captain Kirk clenched his fists. “Take Lt. Uhura to the brig!”

I swallowed.  The brig was the absolute last place I wanted to be and my throat seemed to close up upon hearing his words.  I wanted to ask to be confined to quarters but I knew that the captain, no matter how much he sympathized with my situation, wasn’t about to be lenient with me.  Not anymore.